Satire stories about an artist or bands. Just plain fugly stories!





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I Totally Support Your Band!


I love your band! I want you to know that I totally support your band.

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I just downloaded for free your third album, from some site that leaked it. I have downloaded your first three albums for free and I am waiting for you to make your masterpiece album and when you do that, I will definitely drop some bank for it.

Your band has three albums and it's a bit too much to pay money for all of them. I know you have had special sales on your albums for $5, but I'm hoping you will do a $1.99 sale for each album or do all three albums for $5. I would be all over those deals!


You are my favorite band for sure!

It is impossible for me to spend 30 dollars on your music right now because I recently bought a couple of basketball jerseys of my favorite players.

(if my favorite player gets traded well of course I have to get that jersey and new sneakers too...duh!)Image result for dennis rodman pictures

The jerseys were expensive.

I follow three teams, two are in the East Coast and one in California.

Image result for sam cassell wearing different jerseysImage result for sam cassell with dallas picturesImage result for sam cassell wearing different jerseysImage result for sam cassell wearing different jerseys


 Image result for sam cassell wearing different jerseysImage result for sam cassell with dallasImage result for sam cassell with dallasImage result for sam cassell with dallas pictures


I know you have shirts for sale, but the sports jerseys I purchased left me no money for your band.

I will buy a shirt from you guys the next time y'all are in town. I know you have shirts for sale online, but it's more fun to go a show and get it then. I don't have the money for it right now, anyway, because I am working this summer to make some money to buy some more sports jerseys.

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The more jerseys I wear, the more that people like me at school and think I'm cool.


I totally support your band, but I don't have any money for it right now. I have given your band a like online, so that's definitely showing my strong support for y’all. I’m with you right there, dudes. Sometimes I also give a like and a smiley face online to your posts.

It's my way showing my big metal support! *( see video for reference )


The next time you guys are in town I will for sure make it to your concert and get a shirt. Last month you came to town, but you decided to play in town the same night there was a basketball game. That game was dope!

I had to watch the game because one of my favorite players was playing and a couple of friends of mine were watching the game and I was wearing my jersey. It was such a great game! I felt like I was part of something bigger, even though the team is from the East Coast and I live in the West. I feel a great connection to those millionaires that bounce a basketball.

Last year you guys came to town, but it was the same problem, it was during the playoffs! It's almost like you don't even know that the playoffs were taking place that month.

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I looked at your tour schedule and you had a show just about every night when there was a game. Why did you do that? I don't think your band even considered that some of your fans love sports and it's a bad idea to tour during the playoffs!

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Before you tour, why don't you guys check to see when there are football games (high school, college, professional) and do the same with basketball games and make sure you come to my city on a day when there is no conflict of schedule, and then I'm totally there at your show, ready to rock, with my phone in hand to text and take some selfies and also maybe some pictures of you guys on stage for my online profile.
Anyway, you are the best and I love you! Your music is amazing! Your music means so much to me. I always have it a low volume in the background when I play my video games. I support your music and everything you stand for. Rock on! Metal!
Your biggest fan,
Stevie Jones

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