Satire stories about an artist or bands. Just plain fugly stories!





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It's a brand new year and you want to bond with your loyal fans. Zombie Death Metal is going to be huge in 2017. #ZDM2017

Somehow, ZDM scene is avoiding Conroe Texas. That's the mighty Conroe, Texas to you sir! Danielle want's to tell you a word or two about this and we agree.....represent Danielle make Conroe,Texas proud.

Need directions? Here you go...

Conroe is at 30°18′58″N 95°27′32″W (30.316124, -95.458801).

According to the United States Census Bureau, the city has a total area of 37.9 square miles (98 km2), of which, 37.8 square miles (98 km2) of it is land and 0.1 square miles (0.26 km2) of it (0.21%) is water.

It is about 40 miles (64 km) north of Houston.

Danielle "Death Metal Maniac" Petersen Wants to Know Why Your Band Never Comes to Conroe, Texas.

 Image result for what is Zombie death metal

Danielle has given many likes to your band’s posts on Facebook and she has asked many times why your band never comes to Conroe when you guys go on tour and come through Dallas and Houston.


She’s, like, totally into your band cuz you have the best zombie songs, for sure, and sometimes you are just posting stuff about political stuff or some movie that you saw or some hamburger that you ate or whatever and Danielle gives it a like anyway cuz she’s a fan of your band, like, totally.

Image result for ZOMBIE DEATH METAL BANDS gifsLast year you said on Facebook that y'all would be going everywhere, like seriously, everywhere in Texas, and you went to El Paso, Austin, McAllen, c’mon, friggin McAllen!, like, seriously?

You did a show in the north Dallas at a house party, and she found this out because she saw some girl’s posting about your band hanging out with everyone and taking selfies with people and stuff, and this girl was saying she was BFF with y’all and stuff, and you also went to Oklahoma, which is weird cuz nobody lives in Oklahoma and besides don't nobody care about stupid Oklahoma now that Kevin Durant left the place.

Image result for what is Zombie death metalAnyways, but you don't wanna play in Conroe, why?, because you think that Conroe is close enough to Houston, well, no!, WTH, it ain't that close and besides Danielle don't got no car, man, she's 14 years old, you fool, who's gonna drive her to Houston for a zombie brutal death metal show, man, c’mon, you be, like, trippin or something, it's not like Texas got a good public transportation system, Metro doesn't go all over, you know, and the buses don't come by often, and it's Texas, remember?

it's super hot out here and ain’t nobody gonna be standing in the hot sun in Conroe waiting for no bus, and you gotta be sweating and standing and waiting for the bus to come.

Plus, ain't no bus gonna take Danielle to no zombie death metal concert at a bar, duh! Just come to Conroe already!

I see it in your eyes,  I feel it in your touch,  I taste it from your lips,  And baby more I love you ❄️ #worndoll #halfhead #halfheadarmy 🎪  socks- @killstarco   jacket- @worndoll